my son...

so today...AGAIN...as i was driving i was on a thought journey and realized i was picking names for my son!
it was as if i was already pregnant and due and it was only natural to pick a name...duh!
these things happen as if they are fact! VERY different from the times my mind just wanders or is creating.
IT IS FACT!

the alien in my bed

a couple night ago, i looked over and "saw" michael laying next to me and he had this contraption on his face to help him breath. it was sooooo clear and detailed, with a hose coming out of his mouth to a machine etc.
michael has sleep apnea nad he has this machine for breathing. i have never seen him use it however. i just know it is under the bed.
because of what i saw in my "picture" i asked him if he should start usung it because he has been losing alot of sleep lately because of it.
the next night he did use it and i turned to look at him during the night and i saw exactly what i had seen 2 nights before.

cat

sometimes i will be sitting in the living room, on the couch and i can see down the hall, but cannot see the floor because a love seat is blocking the floor area. i will see a flash of light come around the corner from the bedroom and i always turn really quick to look. then cat will mosey on out from the hall and around the corner of the loveseat.
it was him. it happens ALL the time, all over the house. i swear he is a being sent here to be my friend.

the future...

i realized recently that when i think of michael, i see our future, i see kids, i see getting old, i see a lifetime with him. i haven't felt that in 15 years when justin was in my life.
having to say goodbye was so tragic to me because i knew we were right together. he was definately one of my soul mates. i never thought i would find it again. i was prepared to settle and just live life as it came because i was so broken after that.
i think thats why when i met michael...i knew! cuz i knew how to recognize it. =-)
why do i put this in "my psychic journey"?
i feel like my pictures of the future will lead me there.
i love you michael.
namaste.
sometimes when i look at you i feel like i have known you before. if i didn't know better i feel like i have known you since i was a kid. sometimes, i have flashes of a life we have lived that we haven't.
i remember you told me when i first came out that "you found me again". you said..."we HAVE met before, and we were in love, and i lost you. your name was josephine, and you were my fathers slavegirl. you called me mr. mangum and we had a love affair. my father found out and he had you sent away and i have been looking for you ever since."
=-) smiling.
whether it is true or not, i loved you even more after that for the plain fact that you came up with that story.
sometimes i feel like i need to squelch how much i love you because i wasn't supposed to find you.
it was total happenstance. i feel like you will get stolen from me again.
(maybe we can be like russel and find the hidden idol again and again)
;-)

my son...

i was laying in bed with michael the other night and i felt like i was transported to the future, literally and in a flash...i almost said...can you go check on our son before we go to sleep.
i saw our son...a 3 year old blond boy and his room was my current office/ craft room. his bed was on the wall with the window.
it reminded me that when i first moved here we were sitting in the living room. i was on the love seat and michael was on the couch. i looked up and saw a blonde boy about 1 1/2 years old climb up and sit by michael.
both times he is a quiet, curious, gentle spirit.

the panther

2 days in a rown now i have seen a panther...in my mind
both on my drive to work.
yesterday it had jumped into the middle of the road lunging and sneering at me.
i was still safe though.
today it was sitting upright in the road, watching me.
again, no harm.
curious....
though i'd just jot it down incase the meaning reveals itself.

the hand warmers...

i recently joined this new site called "intent.com" where you can go and post your intent for the day, and people will show their support or post comments on your entries...it has been a very positive experience.
one of my unspoken intents yesterday was to make a new friend. i felt a little selfish wanting that.
at any rate...last night i had to do 2 tours down in old town. one of our stops is at a little chapel that is open 24/7/365, so we never know what we are gonna find in there.
when i went to check it out, i came upon a homeless man...praying. i explained that we were doing a tour and did he mind if we came in? he said...no, and he waited on a bench outside for us to finish.
during the tour stop i watched him wait, with his bundled bedding, for us to finish. i had been complaining about how cold it was, and i had these hand warmers stuffed in my gloves to keep me semi warm.
as i watched him, i realized he had no gloves! he was all curled up into himself to try and generate some warmth. i immediately got up and gave him my hand warmers.
i found myself saying....i don't need these, would you like them?....
he looked up at me and with tears in his eyes said...thank you!
as i sat and watched him some more, i realized, i wasn't as cold as i thought i was.
and helping him was worth more than making a new friend anyday.
so, i thank you universe for letting me find him.